coaching

Hello Childhood, My Old Friend

| jamiefeinberg

A mistake that I used to make, prior to my personal development journey and even early within it, was to think that I had a “normal”childhood, without much to complain about, so didn’t need to bother examining my childhood for “childhood wounds”, “limiting beliefs” or issues from my past that might explain my current struggles. (Quotes to note my discomfort with the idea.)

Oh my goodness – how wrong I was! SO MUCH of what I struggle with today is related to my childhood. Does that mean I had bad parents? Nope! On the contrary, I think I had great parents, and I’m super lucky for all of the blessings I had and have, and for how supportive and attentive they were while also fostering my independence.

But the deeper I go in my personal development, the more I see issues popping up that make MUCH more sense when I put them in the context of my childhood.

Issues around food insecurity, where I get oddly possessive about my food? The recipe was a passion for food + seeing emotional food eating modeled + a few episodes of a family member eating my leftovers. Hello, food obsession!

Over the top anger when someone doesn’t suffer the consequences of their actions? Oh, of course, I remember, that’s something I saw play out as a kid.

Some of my struggles and personality quirks can’t be as directly tied to one incident, but it’s easy to find examples of the behavior that contributed to my mindset on that issue.

It is 100% normal for our childhood experiences to shape how we interact with the world. And we can’t change the past. But it is our choice how we choose to move forward and act today.

Personal development is the super power that gives us the tools to act more deliberately.

Does this resonate for you? Join my new Facebook group or contact me for a free exploratory coaching session, and let’s dive more deeply into this!

P.S. Two HUGE things in our world this past week. Ross’ new holiday ukulele album (it’s gorgeous!) is available for pre-order (you’ll pay half price if you purchase before it drops on December 7th, and you get a few tunes on the spot), and Ross’ online ukulele course is now available for purchase! Both are just in time for the holidays, whether as a gift for a friend or yourself. Please take a look and consider purchasing and/or sharing with your friends and family!

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Ross and Jamie Featured On Podcast – NH Unscripted

| jamiefeinberg

“We never wanted to take on something that we knew we wouldn’t be able to do, that was just a complete pipe dream, but we always wanted to challenge ourselves as well.” – Ross & Jamie on NH Unscripted

Last week Ross and I got to meet Ray Dudley, host of podcast NH Unscripted, over Zoom. We shared so many fun stories with him, including the origin story, about Not Your Mom’s Musical Theater, the company we founded in 2010 in New Hampshire.

If you enjoy theater and musical theater, it’s a must-listen, but if you’re not, it’s also got lots of inspiration and takeaways for people who are motivated to do their thing and craft the life of their dreams.

Give it a listen where podcasts are found, including here, or give it a watch below.

And if you do, please let us know what you think! Lots of humor, lessons, and inspiration.

“So we just found a piano and just went for it. And there was a restaurant across the street – they were our captive audience…..we’d finish a song, and they’d start cheering!” – Ross and Jamie on NH Unscripted

Have a wonderful week, and take care of yourselves and those around you – if you’re an American especially, they probably need it this week.

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Supporting Our Blog

We are so thankful for your support of our blog and our careers! You can help by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Capital One 360 is one everyone can take advantage of to save money! Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Listen to, subscribe and review our theater comedy podcast, Finishing The Season!
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com. 

Top Tips For Facing Your Fear

| jamiefeinberg

What a wild time to be alive, friends! I hope you’re prioritizing your own health and well-being. There’s so much stress and vitriol in the world, and if we let it consume us, it really will.

I read this quote this week and it really resonated with me. It can be really helpful to stop and articulate, with words (out loud or in writing, or even with imagery) how we’re feeling and what we’re fearing. Putting a name to it can make it easier to face. 

Here are some of the things I’m fearing right now: 

  • I won’t build my business to the level I dream about
  • I won’t be able to visit family and friends for a long time
  • I won’t be able to attend my friend’s wedding
  • I won’t be able to safely share my views & background and be my authentic self under our next administration
  • I’m not doing enough to help the causes I care about
  • My BIPOC and LGBTQIAA+ friends and those with disabilities (basically anyone that isn’t a white male, TBH) won’t be safe in the near future

Putting it down makes it clear that that’s a lot to navigate! No wonder I feel stressed sometimes, despite my healthy habits. 

Here are some of the things I’m pursuing to clear my fears: 

  • Daily work on my business & accountability checks with my mastermind & mentors
  • Weekly calls and video calls with friends and family, plus emails and text check-ins
  • Daily and weekly work to encourage voting, educate those around me and assist anyone with questions
  • Supporting the causes I care about, financially and with my time and energy

It’s so, so important to not only articulate what’s on our minds, but, when we’re in the right headspace, make a plan with concrete steps to feel better. If we’re feeling scared of the unknown, what’s one thing that’s within our control that we can make progress on? If we’re frightened that x might happen, what’s one step we can take that will listen the blow if it comes true? 

For instance, if we’re afraid that a wildfire could burn our house down, we should pack an emergency bag & create a plan. 

If we’re afraid of the outcome of an election, we should vote and encourage our friends to do the same, and lend our support to the causes and people we care about if we’re able to do so. 

We can’t eliminate the possibility of the things we fear, in many cases, but we can eliminate the fear by tackling it head on with the pursuit of new things, as Susie Moore says. Taking concrete steps feels good, mentally, physically, and emotionally. 

Can you relate to any of these? What is one thing you can do today to face your fear?

Twenty Years of Yoga: It’s Time To Celebrate!

| jamiefeinberg

Today I’m celebrating a huge milestone – I’ve been a yogini (a female practitioner of yoga) for twenty years!!!

I realize this post is going to age me a bit, but I am so stinkin’ proud that twenty years later, I have a consistent yoga practice and continue to feel the effects that yoga has brought to my life.

I first tried yoga at age sixteen. I went to a private day school in middle and high school (founded by hippies, very pricey, super privileged for sure) and we were required to play sports to fulfill the state’s gym requirement. In the fall of my junior year, the nurse offered yoga as a sports elective, and I was thrilled to do that instead of field hockey (which I loved, but which took up far too much of my otherwise available for theater and music time).

I quickly learned that I already had a great deal of flexibility, which would suit me well, and I also found it tough but enjoyable to sit in silence and close my eyes, particularly around my classmates and friends.

When the nurse decided not to offer it the following year, I was pretty devastated. But I was able to design my own sport by taking yoga and aerobics classes at my local gym instead. I was exposed to several different teachers, realizing that there are lots of styles and approaches to yoga, and some of it is much more strenuous than others.

So began my yoga journey! I’d stretch a bit and try poses on my own, but my class consumption varied widely during college. After college, I picked up a yoga video and then found myself gravitating toward other forms of exercise that incorporated some yoga into the mix. (Yes, Yoga Booty Ballet, I’m looking at you!!! My one and only informercial purchase!)

Over the years, I took advantage of free or affordable yoga whenever possible. A class at a retreat I was working. A series of classes at the same church I accompanied services for. And during my one and only corporate-like stint working at a co-op, I took advantage of the once per week, $5 yoga classes.

When we hit the road in late 2016 in our RV, I was armed with my favorite workout series to date (ChaLean Extreme will date me again) which included some yoga in the mix. I also began experimenting with yoga videos on Amazon Prime and Netflix – I’d download them to my phone when we had good wifi.

In 2018, my husband Ross (with my booking assistance) began improvising music live for yoga classes. This was an incredible gift, because in addition to making money from each of the attendees (shared with the instructor and studio), I got to attend the classes for free! That meant that for a long stretch, I got to take about one yoga class per month, each with a new instructor. The project even inspired Ross to record an ambient music album perfect for relaxation, meditation and yoga. (Link here)

With COVID-19, we have had to put our in-person yoga efforts aside, but the incredible gift of the pandemic for me (if I can say that) has been developing a more consistent yoga practice. My instructor, Tracy, was one of my favorite instructors from almost ten years back at that church job. Nowadays she teaches lessons remotely, so her Vermont location is no problem for me, and her suggested fees are extremely reasonable (and there’s no charge if it’s a hardship for you). (Link to her)

Being in a tiny RV, I can’t do yoga unless my husband is awake and about, but I’ve nevertheless gotten into a routine of yoga and meditation three nights per week, and it has been essential to my stress management, particularly over the last several months as tensions have heightened, from racial justice issues to politics and more. I’ve also tried a few other instructors when my schedule allows, and I’ve experimented a bit with free meditations too.

Previous to the pandemic, I struggled to make yoga a consistent part of my routine. I had no problem doing some stretches before bed, and I always loved the time I gave it, but since it doesn’t feel like “exercise” in the same way that some other forms of movement do, I always made it an extra, if I have time sort of thing.

What I’ve realized this year is that I am much more prepared to face the world when yoga is a mandatory part of my routine. And I’m so thankful that I’ve been able to set that time aside, and that Tracy has made it so affordable. (I even do yoga on those days when she takes time off! It’s now that much of a habit.)

So today I celebrate twenty years of yoga, but not just that – I celebrate twenty years of continuing to fine-tune my practice and develop consistency in my health habits. Habits are a cornerstone of my life and work, and I’m so thankful to have realized how essential yoga is to that for me.

Have you tried yoga? How did/do you like it?

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Supporting Our Blog

We are so thankful for your support of our blog and our careers! You can help by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Capital One 360 is one everyone can take advantage of to save money! Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Listen to, subscribe and review our theater comedy podcast, Finishing The Season!
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com. 

Navigating Relationships During COVID-19: A Preview!

| jamiefeinberg

You may recall that Ross and I created a course for a super-helpful work-from-home bundle that came out a few months back.

We’ve now got a preview from the course posted, so if you’re considering whether Navigating Relationships When You’re Both Working From Home is worth purchasing, this will give you a wonderful taste!

The full bundle of “Essential Work From Home Essentials Training Bundle” includes not only our course on “Navigating Relationships When You’re Both Working From Home”, but 25+ other courses from experts across 10+ fields, all who work at home already.

Please let us know if you have any questions! We’ve been working really hard on this to ensure the content is top tier, and I know the rest of the experts have as well.

Watch the preview here or below, and thanks for reading! As always, we really appreciate your support of our work. Let us know if this is helpful for you.

P.S. You can save on the bundle by purchasing it here!

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Supporting Our Blog

We are so thankful for your support of our blog and our careers! You can help by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Capital One 360 is one everyone can take advantage of to save money! Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Listen to, subscribe and review our theater comedy podcast, Finishing The Season!
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com. 

Using Frustration as Fuel for the Future

| jamiefeinberg

I’ve been dealing with some challenging situations in my work lately. One of my clients has been particularly disorganized, and for the first time in a long time I’m finding it hard not to carry their own stress into my life.

It’s not the scenario I hoped for when I took on this client, but it’s a scenario that many aspiring adventurers know well.

Do you find yourself carrying the stress of your 9 to 5 into your nights and weekends?

Do you find it tough to turn off the worry when you turn off the laptop?

Is it hard for you to devote time to working on your goals and dreams because you’re too stressed about the here and now?

I can certainly relate, and my best piece of advice is this: use your frustration as fuel for the future.

When you catch yourself dwelling on anger or frustration, reframe the situation by saying (out loud, in a journal or in your head) “I’m so thankful for work that allows me to pay my bills. I’m so thankful for work that allows me to save for my future goals. This situation is helping me to build my future dream life.”

Remember that this frustration is fueling your future in multiple ways:

  • Financially – this money supports you while you dream and scheme and plan, and it may let you save enough for funding future too.
  • Emotionally – this experience is giving you visceral lessons that will stick with you moving forward. You’ll remember this feeling and when you lose momentum or focus on the work of dream life creation, remembering how much you don’t want to experience this again will get you that fire under your butt that’s needed for change.

Rewriting our stories is truly important for growth. It’s essential that I keep rewriting my frustration so that instead of a thing that’s happening to me, I put myself in a position of power.

I choose to do this job to support my future life.

I do this work to feed my family.

I’m learning lessons that will help me in the future.

Choose a story of empowerment. Choose to use your frustration as future fuel.

Have you been in this situation?

How did you handle it?

How are you rewriting your story today?

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Supporting Our Blog

We are so thankful for your support of our blog and our careers! You can help by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Capital One 360 is one everyone can take advantage of to save money! Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Listen to, subscribe and review our theater comedy podcast, Finishing The Season!
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com

Balancing Work and Travel

| jamiefeinberg

It’s one of those weeks where it’s a carefully calculated balancing act. We’re hoping to head out of Florida within the next couple of weeks. We managed to avoid damage in last week’s hurricane, but we know we are unlikely to be so luckily if we stick around longer.

That means we need to stock up on provisions (our goal is to avoid stopping for anything but gas and a place to sleep for the night – fingers crossed!), make sure all of our online orders have been delivered, clean up and organize after getting “comfortable” for many months, and remind ourselves what “travel mode” looks like.

Oh, and work! The trickiest thing about all of this is that we still have to keep up with, if not traditional day jobs, all of our clients, and in fact we need to do extra work to make sure we’re ready to depart safely and successfully.

I’m also wrapping up week one of a coaching program, where I’m learning how to be a coach! I’m something I’ve dabbled in the past, and I absolutely love supporting people and helping them find the confidence, strategy and skills to create the life of their dreams. So, suffice to say, it’s been a busy week here in the RV!

Lots of people say that full-time RVing has higher highs and lower lows than the average life. I think that can be true. There’s less consistency, more surprises to deal with, but there’s so much joy from traveling and living life at a different pace. And honestly, so much of it is truly what you make of it.

We know we’re truly spoiled and privileged to live this lifestyle. We always appreciate your good wishes, but we especially love those thoughts and prayers in the coming weeks as we pack up and head out across the country.

Wishing you all a wonderful week. Take care.

P.S. We’ll be taking advantage of our Harvest Hosts membership when we travel. Free space to park in exchange for buying wine and other goodies? Sign us up! Get yours at a 15% discount and support our blog when you sign up!

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Supporting Our Blog

We are so thankful for your support of our blog and our careers! You can help by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Capital One 360 is one everyone can take advantage of to save money! Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Listen to, subscribe and review our theater comedy podcast, Finishing The Season!
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com. 

Three Places To Focus When The World Is Spinning

| jamiefeinberg

Gosh, things are challenging right now! Even with all of my blessings and privilege, I’m feeling like it’s tough to stay in the moment and also to stay focused on my goals when the world seems to be falling apart around me.

So here is an update on the three things I’m focusing on right now to keep me going.

Habits

I’ve spent years developing the habits I’ve always wanted to have. It’s been a slow process, adding them in one by one, and a couple I’ve let go or let be flexible as I’ve figured out what’s worked for me. But developing great habits is SO important when things are stressful.

For me, my daily habits include writing in the morning (brain dump, gratitude, journal from the day prior…anything counts, but I write for about 15-20 minutes typically and make sure to at least write something), reading something for my personal development, walking outside, making myself a healthy breakfast, drinking at least 16 ounces of water and taking my vitamins. I’ve also got some personal prep routines in the mix, and lately I do some meditation and yoga in the mix too (I take three live classes currently, 3 days a week, and it’s such a blessing). Habits give you predictability when the world around you feels like a total disaster!

Daily Activism

Black Lives Matter. The state of the world has me panicked, I’m not going to lie. So one way for me to address that is to make sure that every day, I make time to do something to make the world a better place. I stand up for someone who needs it, I sign some petitions, I write my reps or make a phone call. I can’t do it all, but being able to say I’ve done something every day is key to feeling like I’m making a difference and not being complacent as it feels like we’re moving towards fascism. (The news of people being taken off the streets in unmarked vehicles is just the latest, of course. I’m not planning to stop bugging my reps until Trump backs off of that.)

Planning Ahead and Being Prepared

I also take time every day to think about planning ahead and being prepared. Am I well-stocked with food and supplies? Have I taken a few minutes to create a vision for the future of my business? Have I researched the next steps for my career goals? Even when these things seem like a silly distraction, I know that taking a few minutes to do this daily will make sure that when I look back on 2020, I’ll see how I made the best of it rather than how I fell apart.

Bonus: Self-Care

If you’re like me, without kids, white, employed, this list probably makes sense so far. If you’ve got lots of additional issues you’re dealing with right now, whether that’s mental health or sick family or anything else, please prioritize your self-care and give yourself grace when things don’t happen.

And if you’re like me, you probably STILL feel overwhelmed daily. I know I do. So take what works from this list and build your own list that DOES work for you. Take a bath. Have some ice cream. And leave me a comment to let me know how you’re coping during these challenging times.

I’ll also take a couple of sentences to plug Deadbolt Mystery Society – we’ve just completed our third mystery box and it is an absolutely delightful way to spend a few hours! At-home date nights for the win. Use my code to save a little cash. It is seriously the best time we’ve had since quarantine started. Perfect for 1-4 people with access to the internet and a smartphone with a QR code reader.

Sending love and hugs (virus-free) to all of you across the miles. Thanks for reading.

______________________________

Supporting Our Blog

We are so thankful for your support of our blog and our careers! You can help by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Capital One 360 is one everyone can take advantage of to save money! Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Listen to, subscribe and review our theater comedy podcast, Finishing The Season!
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com.