self-help

how to break out of a funk

A hazy sunrise
| jamiefeinberg

Okay, I’ll just be honest. I’m sitting here, feeling bleh. I don’t want to write a blog, I don’t want to be creative, and I don’t want to work. I don’t know what I want, but I wouldn’t say no to junk food, hugs, or a warm bed right now. Motivation is far away right now, that’s for sure.

So what do you do when you aren’t motivated, but you have obligations to keep? When you know you should be doing something, and maybe some specific “somethings”, but you find a part of your brain telling you to do anything else instead, or maybe scroll social media instead. What do you do when you know you should get some work done, but you’re just not feeling it?

It’s honestly a self-experiment. Different moods and different people will find different things help them to break out of the funk. Some of us need outside accountability to get things done. Others bristle at the suggestion of doing anything unless it comes from within. We are all unique, and if we haven’t done a lot of self-reflection and work, we may not have figured out how best to crack the code when we’re in one of these moods. (Or maybe we just become obstinate sometimes and ignore that inner knowing of what we should do? Maybe it’s just me…)

Keep this list on hand for when your brain is just saying “nope” and you need an idea of what to do next.

Here are a few ideas to try when you’re stuck:

  • Talk to an accountability buddy
  • Talk to a loved one
  • Journal about what’s going on
  • Meditate
  • Get outside
  • Take a walk/run
  • Dance to a favorite song
  • Take a nap
  • Splash your face with cold water
  • Have a cup of tea or coffee
  • Eat a comforting meal
  • Play with your pet
  • Turn on an inspiring podcast
  • Make some art
  • Color
  • Try some aromatherapy
  • Play an instrument
  • Sing
  • Try a couple of yoga postures
  • Talk to a cricket

Ha! Gotcha. Made up that last one. Just wanted to see if you were still reading. (But hey, Jiminy Cricket may indeed have some wise words for you!)

Can you relate to this feeling?

What do you recommend to break out of a funk?

P.S. It may take MANY of these steps to break you out of your funk. Offer yourself grace if you can’t change things for yourself right away. And if you’d like some support to help you become more efficient, happier, and clearer on your next steps in life, let’s schedule a time to talk!

A version of this article was originally published on February 26, 2021.

My Six Favorite Books for Motivation and Self-Reflection

| jamiefeinberg

A friend of mine is entering a transition period in her life, and she asked me for suggestions of books for motivation and dealing with change.

I didn’t answer right away, because I wanted to sit with it and revisit my favorites.

By the time I’d created my list, I realized that other people might want these book suggestions too!

Here are six books you might enjoy. Have you read any of them, and if not, which are you inspired to tackle first?

Untamed by Glennon Doyle – Glennon’s book motivated me to get more deliberate about diversifying my social media feeds, a small move that’s led to me learning so much! Her stories share her own journey. Expect lots of self-revelation, humor, with a healthy dose of intersectional feminism and inspiration in the mix. I loved it, and it really resonated with me. She’s been through a lot of change under challenging circumstances, and she gets very real and raw.

The One Thing by Gary W. Keller and Jay Papasan – I’ve read a lot of great self-help books and advice for business, but The One Thing has had more of a lasting impact on my daily and weekly work than most others. The authors will motivate you to get clear about what matters and take deliberate steps with that in mind. Your giant to-do list is SO much less important than knowing the most important item (or perhaps two or three max) on your list for today, and for this week, and for this year. It’s very relevant for entrepreneurs and employees alike, but I’d argue it’s even more important in your personal life!

Present Over Perfect by Shauna Niequist – In all honesty, my advice to my friend was to read this “or anything by Shauna Niequist”. This was the first book I ever read that I felt I could have written myself. I’ve read it three times, and I will keep returning to it, over and over again, because it helps me to reflect, consider what’s most important, and remember my values and current vision for my life. I found it therapeutic and challenging. She navigates changes and surprises as she transitions into a new phase of her life. Her older books are great too, though for where I am now, Present Over Perfect is key. I’ve got her next book pre-ordered and I can’t wait.

The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron – You know, when you were that little kid who’d happily color and explore with other little kids at preschool? If you go back far enough, almost all of us had a time where we created without judgment or expectation. If you take nothing else from this incredible three month journey into getting to know yourself better and rediscovering your inner creative, you should consider “morning pages” and “artist dates”. I continue my morning pages practice daily and love weekly artist dates whenever possible too. Trust me, if you haven’t done this yet, this is a brilliant introduction to self-help or return to creativity (or both).

The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin – This is a newer book for me – I discovered it several months ago and was so impressed with it that I’m incorporating it into my coaching. There are lots of personality tests out there, but this one is both easy to comprehend quickly and also extremely actionable. And if you find it useful, she’s got lots of additional resources (and an app that lets you connect with others about it).

The Road Back To You and The Path Between Us by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile (the latter by just Suzanne) – I’ve been geeking out on Enneagram podcasts lately. If you’re not familiar with the Enneagram, it’s an ancient road map for living, basically. Think personality test, but one where you identify yourself (mainly based on what motivates you) and then can use that knowledge to help you navigate the world and become a healthier, happier version of yourself. I’m learning so much about myself through these books and podcasts that I’m actually recruiting a group of folks to do an Enneagram group program with me – basically, a book club where we’re all doing some self-reflection as we learn about the Enneagram. (I’m actively looking for volunteers, and cost is super low for the materials!)

What are you reading right now? Have you read any of these? Do you want to join my Enneagram cohort, where we watch videos and learn about the Enneagram and discuss it with other people?

I’d love to hear from you – and thanks so much for reading!

Photo by John-Mark Smith on Unsplash

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Supporting Our Blog

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  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums! 
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  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
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You’re Not Alone (Acknowledging Anxiety)

| jamiefeinberg

Three weeks back, I did something I’d been wanting to do for many months – I started seeing a therapist.

If I had my way, we’d all have affordable (for us) access to a therapist. A good one, who listens and knows the types of therapy that would be most helpful for us. Someone who gives us a safe space to work through the crap in our minds and helps us sort out our stuff.

If you’re reading this and you’re feeling like you’re in a great place right now, I am thrilled for you! I can tell you that from what I’m seeing on my social media feeds and hearing about through news outlets, it sure seems like most of the world has moved on from COVID-19 and is getting back to “normal”, or close to it. And it that’s you, I’m thrilled for you, and I truly hope you’re enjoying every minute of freedom and “normalcy”.

But honestly, even though I am sick of wearing masks, and miss seeing people’s faces, and I miss eating out at a restaurant in the winter, I’m just not there yet. It feels too soon, to me, to return to normal.

Lifting a mask mandate is all well and good (for most) when there’s a mild variant on the loose. But what if a new, more dangerous variant catches us off guard? One contagious enough to spread under the radar, when we’re least expecting it?

I’d love to say I’m embracing the now and taking it day by day and not worrying about what might come next. But that wouldn’t be accurate.

So these are the kinds of thoughts that are on my mind. I’m carrying a lot of stress and anxiety around COVID. Like a lot of us are.

Add to that the stressors of getting settled in a new country and the pressures and fears of a world at war, not to mention the anger and frustration at seeing so many people’s rights being taken away in the US (including New Hampshire, where I grew up, and Florida, our adopted home state), and I’m even more thankful to have a therapist.

I’m not sharing this for praise, or for pity.

I want you to know you aren’t alone. I want you to know that whether you wear a mask or not, and whether you’re “moving on” or not, it’s okay to experience anxiety.

And I want you to know that it’s okay to have some days, some weeks, even some months or years, where you’re not okay. Where you’re going through the motions, or phoning it in. Maybe you’ve had to take some time off, or add a nap into your routine. Maybe you’re tired of saying no to social plans out of fear.

Wherever you are, I want to encourage you.

Reach out to loved ones. They’ll probably relate, maybe even more than you realize.

Get a therapist if you can, and if not, seek out a trusted mentor or spiritual leader, or find an online support group aligned with where you are. Look for sliding scale therapy or call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline, or many of the other free resouces that may exist in your country, state, or city.

I’ve been digging deeper into the Enneagram for the past several months, and that means I’m doing a lot of work on getting to myself – who I am, how I became that person, and how I can become an even healthier, better version of me.

I also rely on journaling, exercising, getting outside, and all of my other existing coping mechanisms for when things get tough or feel overwhelming.

Whatever method(s) you use, and wherever you’re at, I’m wishing you all the best. You’re not alone.

And if you’re reading this, you’re here now, and I’m so glad.

Thanks for reading, and take care.

P.S. I’d like to get a group together to read The Road Back To You and do some Enneagram explorations. No previous experience required, just a copy of the book. If this journey of self-reflection (in a group setting) appeals to you, please leave a comment and let me know!

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Supporting This Blog

Thank you for your support of this blog and our work! You can help further by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums! 
  • Take Ross’ online ukulele course!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com. 

The Three Things Keeping You From Your Dream Life

| jamiefeinberg

Take a moment. Breathe. Check in with yourself, right now.

Are you content? Are you happy with life as it is?

I know the world is a lot. A LOT. But when you look at your own life, day to day, if you don’t have a resounding “yes, I’m happy!” under it all, I’d like to challenge you to look deeper.

No, I’m not selling a miracle elixir. I’m not curing cancer or growing money on trees. But I am sharing a workshop where I’ll share the three elements that I believe are keeping you from your dream life. It’s based on my experience in setting goals, accomplishing them, and learning to make the deliberate shifts required to bring my dream life to fruition.

Intrigued? I’m presenting the workshop, The Three Things Keeping You From Your Dream Life (And What You Can Do About It) for FREE in my Facebook group at 11 a.m. ET/8 a.m. PT and on Instagram at 3 p.m. ET/12 p.m. PT. (Replays for both will be posted after the live events.)

And if you’re ready for more clarity and a support system to help you create the life of your dreams, use my code EARLYBIRD to save big on my course and group coaching program, Crafting Your Life Adventure.

P.S. I was recently interviewed for The No Frills VA Podcast! We talk all things full-time RV, adventuring, digital nomad life, how I built my VA business from scratch and why and how I’m focusing on a coaching business now. You can watch the interview here or listen here, or wherever you find your podcasts. Give it a listen and let me know what you think!

______________________________

Supporting Our Blog

We are so thankful for your support of our blog and our careers! You can help by doing any or all of the following:

  • Purchase one of Ross’ albums! 
  • Take Ross’ online ukulele course!
  • Become a patron of our work!
  • Make purchases via our Amazon website links. There is no additional cost to you, and a portion of the proceeds can support our travels. Begin your Amazon search here.
  • Make other purchases using our affiliate links. Signing up with Dosh is a great way for everyone with a smartphone to support us, and we also have options for aspiring virtual assistants as well as occasional and full-time RVers to save money.
  • Subscribe to our blog, as well as perhaps InSearchOfAScoop.com, and recommend our work to your friends and family.
  • Take music or theater lessons (group or private) from us, either in person or via Skype at TinyVillageMusic.com.