Rossandjamieadventure

Breaking the cycle & taking one step 

| jamiefeinberg

How are you feeling today, friend? If you pause right now and take a few deep breaths with me, I invite you to ask yourself that question. What stands out to you? Are you physically comfortable? Are you present to your body? Are your thoughts racing? Do you feel energized, or depleted, or somewhere in between? 

Photo of a winter scene of a yard and house in the city, with snow, a fence, and sun peeking through trees

As we head into Hanukkah Sunday, are in the midst of Advent, and head toward Solstice and Christmas at a speedy pace, you may be caught up in activities and obligations. 

As we see daily headlines out of a terrifying movie or horrendous chapter of history, there are lots of distractions demanding our attention. 

Whether you’re finding yourself relentlessly busy or attempting to hide from it all, I hear you, and I see you. Today, I wanted to share one technique that can help me when I find myself caught in familiar patterns. For an audio version of this, head to my Substack.

We all have habitual patterns of our personality. These are patterns that we found served as well as children, keeping us safe and comfortable or at least giving us some sense of security and consistency. As we age, these well-honed patterns can become a trap. While they are well-honed, it is possible to break out of the cycle, the pattern, and make a different choice. But it requires a level of awareness of what’s going on and a willingness (and ability) to make a different choice. 

For instance, one of my patterns is that when I start to feel like I am overwhelmed or angry, my default setting is to cope with the scenario by doing. Specifically, I go to the most accessible task – I find that cleaning, especially washing dishes, is a go to, but I may also simply choose the easiest task on my to-do list or even go to scroll a video on my phone. 

The wiser part of my brain isn’t running the show here. Instead, I’m simply stuck in a pattern. 

So what can I do about it? 

The first step is to literally stop. Stop doing. Sometimes this means I literally stop whatever I’m doing and go sit down for an extra reminder that I do truly need to stop. Once I’ve stopped, I take a few deep breaths. You can even do a quick body scan to see where you’re holding onto tension or pain. I notice the physical sensations of where I am and what I’m doing. Notice if I was holding my breath. Notice my posture. Observe where I am in space right now. My body on the floor or whatever surface it is on. Let my extra thoughts go. 

Next, I observe what’s been going on. Am I in a calm or chaotic environment right now? How am I relating to others, and how are they responding to me? Am I myself feeling calm and regulated, or am I defaulting into the patterns of my personality? 

When I am physically present to what’s going on, if it feels accessible, I also have the option to ask my WISE mind why I started doing that task. Was I acting from fear? From anxiety? It can be useful to observe what just happened. But sometimes, asking WHY feels scary. Maybe it’s a very sensitive topic right now. If that’s true for you, just focus on the physical sensations. 

When I do feel I am in my “wise mind” and calmer, present and awake, I can ask myself some questions. You might ask what is yours to do in this situation, in the words of Suzanne Stabile. In the words of Byron Katie, you might ask “what am I believing right now? How does it make me feel? Is it true? Is it really true? Who would I be if I let go of that belief?”. 

And finally, having paused, observed and and done some self-reflection, you’re free to make new choices. Allow and encourage yourself to forgive yourself and try something new. 

Is your wise mind reminding you of a task that’s truly most important now? Do you finally have the clear head to make a call you’ve put off? To take ten minutes and start a dreaded task? Use this calm state to move forward with one thing today. 

There are versions of this process in both my Enneagram work and in my mental fitness work. You may have encountered a similar process elsewhere that works for you. Please let me know how you do this work in your own life. And if you haven’t yet, let me know if you’re going to try it! 

Want some support breaking out of your habitual patterns to feel more joy, create a life you love, and be more YOU? Come grab your free session with me.

permission to pause

| jamiefeinberg

Whether you’re navigating health challenges or life challenges that are more intense or are just in the midst of the more typical year-end, holiday pressures and commitments that usually seem to define this time of year: today I am giving you permission to pause. 

Photo of snowy trees by by Adam Lukac

Want to take a nap, but feeling guilty about everything remaining on your to-do list? This is your permission slip. 

Got an invite to another holiday party, but feeling like you’d rather stay home in your PJs? Skip it. Let them know you’ve got another commitment. (You don’t have to tell them it’s a commitment to your own self-care if you don’t want to.) 

Feeling pressured to make a decision? Let them know you’ll need another day or another week (or whatever time feels right) before you’ll be able to get back to them about it. 

Pause. 

There is so much worthy of our attention, but we are human beings and we have limits, friends. As much as we may try to push them regularly. As much as we may be known as the “busy” person in our circle of friends. 

Your friends and family love you, even if you have to skip a commitment because you’re getting a cold or you need another night to sleep or rest ahead of an important event. 

Permission to pause. Take your permission slip, and use it whenever you need it. It doesn’t expire. 

Does this resonate with you? If so, let a friend who could use the reminder know about it. 
Want some support navigating boundaries and helping you to bring your dreams to life?  Come grab your free session with me.

One foot planted in gratitude, one foot in hope

| jamiefeinberg

Thanksgiving was my favorite holiday growing up. I loved having a food-centric and people-centric holiday without the pressure of expectations of gifts and making time for concerts and church services and all the things. There’s something simple about this idea, of stopping to be grateful and enjoy the bounty of the harvest. 

It is, of course, an entirely whitewashed version of events containing very little truth. And I understand that acknowledging Thanksgiving without truly being present to all the harm settlers have done since colonizing North America is problematic, at best. 

Photo: Sun peaks through the clouds over the water 

And yet, we can all use more gratitude in our lives, I have to imagine, and if you have a good relationship with your family, all the better on a holiday like Thanksgiving, where that gratitude can extend to the company you’re keeping or to the memories you’re cherishing. And I hope you have a community that you love, and feel loved by, whether it’s your chosen family or given family or both.  

I try to remember the truth while also enjoying the extra focus on gratitude that I think we’d all be better for focusing on more often throughout the year. 

Just as I juggle the duality of Thanksgiving and how we celebrate in the US (as well as in Canada – I get to celebrate it twice!), I also daily see duality in my life. I juggle the duality of gratitude for my many blessings, supportive people, health care, good food, amazing humans and creatures in my life, at the same time that I feel enraged, anxious, fearful around politics, around destruction and violence, around inequalities, around feeling like politicians aren’t listening and/or are mainly complete bought and owned by billionaires. 

Are you able to hold on to gratitude and hope? What dualities do you see playing out in your life? And how are you celebrating Thanksgiving this year, if you are? 

Thanks for contemplating with me. If you found this useful, you may also enjoy my recent grounding practice for winter.And if you’re looking for more mental fitness tools or would like some help tuning down the sabotaging thoughts so you can enjoy your life more, come grab your free session with me. 

You may also know someone else who’d appreciate this. If so, I hope you’ll share it with a friend. Thanks for being here. Keep resisting. 

a moving meditation

| jamiefeinberg

Last week, I explored a grounding practice for the winter, and I offered an audio recording to try with it. It must have resonated with a lot of people, because it was the largest response I’ve seen to one of my posts in a long time. So today, I’m going to offer a moving meditation. 

I love moving meditation, because when my brain is busy, as it often is, it’s easier to get myself to incorporate a moving practice than a practice of stillness into my life. Although it’s much improved given my mental fitness practices, I still often find myself with a chatty inner critic and persistent sabotaging thoughts, from anxious to angry to wanting to avoid things, that threaten to derail me. 

Fading fall colors and trees overlook the ocean. Photo by Jamie Feinberg. 

After unsuccessful attempts to incorporate meditation into my life (at least beyond walking and yoga), I finally found a meditation practice I could stick with when I turned it into a moving meditation. I now do one every single morning, and it’s been extraordinarily life-changing for me. 

I credit my mental fitness work with helping me to instill the habit and also to introduce me to just how important the work is. 

I could write an entire article on HOW to do it, likely several, but for today, I’m just going to focus on the doing. First, let’s define what I’m talking about.

There are all sorts of moving meditations out there. There’s a beautiful Buddhist practice that can be very popular,involving an extremely slow practice of moving (generally outside). But for those of us whose busy brains or bodies who won’t let us consider that type of practice, we’ve got another option. It’s also a great way to incorporate mindfulness into your exercise routine. 

This practice can be done on a treadmill or walking around indoors, though I highly recommend an outside walk (or even a jog or run) if that is possible for you right now. As I type this, I’m indoors, looking out at the gorgeous sun and blue sky. This would be a perfect day to do this outside, because while it is very cold right now on Prince Edward Island, the sun can assist with both the feel of the temperature and with my mental state. 

This is the practice. If you’d like to try it, or if you’d prefer to hear it modeled for you rather than read it, here you go. 

Begin by claiming this time, and this space, for yourself. Tune in to your breath. Observe the inhale and the exhale. What parts of your body get involved when you breathe? 

If you haven’t yet, let’s begin walking. If you’d rather do this practice while jogging or running, that’s also a possibility. Just keep tuning in to your body. If you’re having a challenging time multi-tasking, please put your safety first and slow down. 

Let’s begin by feeling the surface underneath us. Notice the sensations you feel with each step. What can you observe as you step? Now let’s tune in to the sounds our limbs make as they land. What else can you notice? 

Observe the muscles that get involved when you take a step. Be present to what your feet are doing, and what feelings are present. Notice the movement of your legs as you move. 

Now, let’s observe the movements of your upper body. Is there a rhythm to your hands or arms? Feel the feeling of the wind or air on your face. If there’s sun on you, can you feel it? Notice whatever physical sensations you can right now. 

Now, let’s focus our attention on our sense of sight. What colors can you observe around you today? What textures can you discern? What movements inhabit the world you’re encountering? Can you find some details that you’ve never noticed before? 

I love to notice details in the trees, along walls, and find flowers and other nature wherever I go. What are you present to today? 

Let’s try to focus on our sense of touch. Using your fingertips, choose a texture to focus on. It can be your clothing, your skin, or something outside of yourself. Move your fingertips around to feel all the physical sensations of touch

Now, let’s turn our attention to our sense of sound. What is the farthest sound you can hear right now? Focus your attention on it, and see how many details you can discern. Now, let’s focus our attention on the closest sound you can hear. And once more, let’s focus on another sound that calls your attention. What details and nuances can you notice?

These ideas can be repeated ad nauseum. You can also allow yourself to follow your own instincts, focusing especially on the five senses. Enjoy your movement meditation for as long as you’d like to today. 

I hope this has been helpful for you. If you found it useful, you may also enjoy last week’s grounding practice for winter.And if you’re looking for more mental fitness tools or would like some help tuning down the sabotaging thoughts so you can enjoy your life more, come grab your free session with me. 

And if this was useful, I hope you’ll share it with a friend. Thanks for being here. Keep resisting.  

A poem for today 

| jamiefeinberg

Today I read news, both positive election results (well done!!!) and the sadness and resignation of friends who are out of options, recognizing they can no longer afford health insurance, which means they can no longer afford to see their doctors, pay for their prescriptions, or maintain any illusion that they have a safety net for the inevitable expenses of health care due to the for-profit nature of medical care in the United States. 

Photo of a sunset over the boardwalk by Jamie Feinberg

People share their best tips for eating on a budget and making due if food stamps are cut or gone. 

Politicians on the wrong side of history pledge to publish people who stood up for themselves and used their power in NYC and elsewhere. 

The United States is no longer just a country living under the threat of daily gun violence in schools and other community gathering places. It is also a country at war with itself, destroying any sense of safety and community and any illusions its children and others had. 

Those who followed the rules aren’t safe. No one is safe, though the lightness of your skin can help. 

I exchange stories with friends who are socking away food for the winter, like squirrels and chipmunks, unsure what the winter has in store or how it will end. 

In one hand, I hold gratitude for my amazing family, friends, and neighbors. I work to stay present to the textures my hands touch, to the warmth of a hug, to the creaminess of the oat milk in my coffee. In the other hand, I work to break free of the inner critic, telling me I am not doing enough, and the sometimes paralyzing anxiety about where we are headed and what could be next. 

I sit here, warm under blankets and a cat who adopted us in Florida ( once a fun and affordable home for our RV, now a place we’re not sure we’ll ever return to again). 

I remember that whatever our own health challenges are, whatever our own financial struggles may be, we are extraordinarily grateful to be in Canada, to be here, right now. 

As you write your own poems, remember the joy. I hope you can find the moments of calm, the moments of love, the moments of beauty. I hope you never give up and that you never give in. 

You are worthy. And I will do what I can to support you. Love your neighbors, friends. 

When mind games are kicking in and you’d like support learningto control your thoughts and stop the self-sabotage, take a saboteur assessment. 

Work with me
My favorite Enneagram resources

Two signs of progress

| jamiefeinberg

Anyone else getting sick of “adulting”, aka going through the world bearing some of the boring responsibilities of being a human (at least in our current society) when fascists are taking over and cultures and families and people are being destroyed? 

I feel this way a lot, but in addition to pausing to get present and taking time for joy where I can as means to combat inertia/anxiety/despair, I am also trying to stop and celebrate signs of progress when I see them. 

A solo raven perches on top of a birch tree branch (photo by Jamie Feinberg)

One sign of progress, of course, was that more than 7 million (some sources suspect it was closer to 8 million) people turned out, entirely peacefully, for the No Kings rallies across the United States and even in some cities around the world. Scholars much more qualified than me rightly shared criticisms of the effort (which wasn’t really a “protest”, and didn’t have clearly articulated goals and next steps in place, amongst other things), but I think it’s reasonable to rejoice at the show of solidarity and optics of having an event like that – especially after so many right-wing extremists were warning about the “violent” people who’d be participating. While there were a few violent people who tried to dampen the mood, those who turned out to say no to kings did so peacefully. 

If you made it out for No Kings, thank you, and I hope you found it encouraging, made some new friends, and were inspired to take some additional steps to protest the rights and freedoms of your fellow Americans and humans of all sorts. 

Another sign of progress is at a more local level. In Boston, Massachusetts, Fenway Health works to provide affordable and accessible health care, and in a stunning move becoming too common across the US, they recently announced they’d stop offering healthcare for trans youth – in an effort, they said, to protect their ability to serve other people due to the changing regulations. 

Photo of the ocean through the trees with changing leaves by Jamie Feinberg

From Fenway Health’s website: “The Trans Health Program at Fenway Health supports members of trans and gender diverse communities, their families, and the providers who serve them. We provide patient-centered, evidence-based care to ensure trans and gender diverse people are informed and affirmed in their gender and healthcare needs.”

What infuriates me to no end is when healthcare providers like Fenway don’t acknowledge that offering trans healthcare for youth is actually the safest, least invasive way to provide trans healthcare, because youth who know they are trans are saved having to complete puberty and thus require more invasive care down the line (often with less success) when we provide them with the care they need at a younger age. Not to mention the rates of suicide and murder for trans people….I could keep going, but here’s the good news!

Boston and those from around the region who rely on Fenway have decided they aren’t going to take no for an answer. Hundreds have taken to the picket lines, and reportedly some people who’ve come to Fenway for their care (like flu shots) have instead joined the picket line! 

Erin in the Morning reported the following: 

“We are calling on Fenway to find brave and creative solutions to maintain funding while following their mission to provide the same rights to every patient,” said Teddy Walker, a 20-year-old Boston student, reading from a statement penned alongside 21-year-old Berry Andres, their co-organizer for Monday’s action. Both are Fenway patients who started hormone therapy as teens—the very care and demographic being cut off now. So they know intimately how vital this life-saving care is for trans young people.

“This failure of courage does not have to be permanent,” Walker told Erin in the Morning. “We can still be allies in this historic fight together, because we know Fenway Health is not our enemy. The Trump Administration is. But that does not mean we will stand idly by as Fenway does Trump’s work for him by stripping patients of their care.”

Have you seen a sign of progress this past week? I’d love to hear about it. And as always, if you need support in navigating these and other challenges, I’d love to speak with you. Let’s start with a saboteur assessment. 

Work with me

My favorite Enneagram resources 

Take good care, friends. 

Pockets of joy

| jamiefeinberg

I’ve been navigating some of the most challenging work I’ve faced since moving to Canada lately, and it’s exhausting. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. So much so, that trying to come up with a topic for this article in the midst of my schedule and all of that feels like a lot. 

So I thought I’d share some of the joy I’ve gotten to experience over the past month or so instead. Maybe this will feel more like when I started my Ross and Jamie Adventure blog back in the day, when we focused on sharing our travels across the United States in a 25’ RV. (Head here if you want to be notified when that book is ready.) Regardless, I hope you enjoy my share about where I’ve found some pockets of joy lately. 

First photo taken on my walk by the hospital of the ocean, with beautiful greenery in the foreground and blue sky; second photo of pink flowers spotted at the Dunes Gallery (both photos by Jamie Feinberg)

Earlier this week, I had an appointment for bloodwork. I’d done some hard things already that day, so my first thought was, let’s go get ice cream afterward! (It’s my favorite way to treat myself, after all.) But a wise voice in my head said, I think I’d enjoy walking by the water on the path near the hospital even more than I’d enjoy ice cream. WOW. My sage voice was loud and clear. And such wisdom. So after I got my blood drawn, I walked across the street and walked along the ocean, enjoying breezes in the tall trees and absolutely gorgeous views. What a treat! (And since I’m currently being more mindful of what I eat right now, how nice that a pretty walk is a zero calorie treat!)

Connecting with friends and family is such a wonderful gift in my life. I’ve had lovely conversations, shared hugs, gone out for ice cream and taken walks with friends. Especially when things are challenging, it is so helpful to have people who are happy to listen and support you. I’m especially grateful for the work I do to maintain and grow my friendships when these more challenging situations arise. 

PEI raspberries are absolutely amazing (and iconic, thanks to Anne of Green Gables), and yet my first summer here, I couldn’t find them anywhere and missed the season entirely. Ever since, I make it my mission to find them, because it’s my favorite fruit and local is absolutely best. I’m so grateful for the friends who help to keep me informed or even share their own bounty with me! Last year I picked raspberries at a friend’s house, and this year, a friend shared some of her first raspberry crop with me. What an amazing gift!

Last weekend, I went to one of our local favorite places for ice cream, Cricker’s Creamery, which does amazing homemade baked goods and has tons of gluten-free options. I went there twice in a row because raspberries arrived. On the first day, I had what may have been the best ice cream concoction I’ve ever had – or at least of the flurry variety. My vanilla soft serve had fresh PEI raspberries mixed into it, with hot fudge on top. What an absolutely perfect delight! On day two, I was a little bit disappointed that the raspberries were now frozen, not fresh. But still – where else can you get local raspberries with ice cream and hot fudge? So much joy. 

Photo of my vanilla soft serve swirled with fresh PEI raspberries and topped with hot fudge (photo credit: Jamie Feinberg)

Other moments of joy lately: 

  • Snuggling my amazing cat
  • Time with my husband
  • Supporting mental fitness clients & spending time with my Enneagram groups
  • Visiting the Dunes Gallery, home of my favorite gardens on PEi
  • Driving through PEI National Park
  • Gazing at the ocean 
  • Attending wonderful events with friends, some planned, and some serendipitous, like when I showed up for an impromptu beach visit to find friends I’d just seen at another event were here (with another couple), and they invited me to join them!

The world is so much. I hope that in between your phone calls, donations, raging at the world and doing all the regular tasks to maintain and sustain a life, that you’re able to offer yourself opportunities to pause, do some good self-care, and find pockets of joy. 

Recent articles from me you might enjoy: 

Let good enough be good enough

Creating space, allowing stillness

Anxious for the future? Quiet and control those hyper-vigilant thoughts

Finding gratitude while facing fascism

Enjoy the sun

10 ways your mind is messing with you

Joy as resistance

Tell me when I can pre-order your book!

Let good enough be good enough

| jamiefeinberg

In brainstorming what to explore here, some weeks it just comes to me. Other weeks aren’t as obvious. Today, I asked myself what I needed to hear right now, and that’s how the title came to me: let good enough be good enough. 

Photo of assorted flowers and trees in a neighborhood park by Jamie Feinberg

According to the Enneagram, a tool for personal growth I’ve been studying for more than five years now, some people (known as Type 1s) heard a very particular message when they were children – “it isn’t okay to make mistakes”. In spite of the best intentions, so often, in our families of origin, we manage to internalize the idea that there’s a problem if we make mistakes. So as a protective mechanism, some of us become perfectionistic. And yet when we do so, this overfocus on perfecting ourselves, perfecting those around us, or being a great role model for others means that we lose ourselves along the way, becoming less confident and unbalanced as a result, and more obsessed with control, repression, and worry. 

But we don’t need to be a “type 1” for us to pick up the message that it isn’t safe for us to make mistakes. Maybe it’s because of the color of our skin that we’ve internalized that message, or maybe we have a neurodivergent brain that isn’t understood by those around us. Maybe a domineering parent or an unsafe environment at school or at home contribute to it. 

One of the things, therefore, that I benefit a lot from, and that you may too, is remembering that most of the time, it’s best to let good enough be good enough. 

In my mental fitness work, we say only 20% of tasks, at most, need us to do them perfectly (or close to it). For the remaining 80% of tasks, the healthy and reasonable thing is to let good enough be good enough. 

Especially when I’m feeling stressed or navigating a lot of extra potential stressors already, I know I need to remember and heed this message. 

Here are a few ways I’ve “let good enough be good enough”. I hope these inspire you and you’ll try it on for size: 

  • Have time for a fancier meal? On the fence about whether it’s worth it to put in the extra effort? Keep it simple. Your body and mind will thank you later. 
  • Not sure your wording of that email is perfection? Is the email being sent to someone who already knows your work? Can you afford to have an imperfect word or two in this email? Let it go, and send it. 
  • Struggling to choose the right outfit for a night out? Consider the “needs” involved, and then just choose something. It doesn’t need to be the best outfit you’ve ever worn. Let good enough be good enough. 
  • Prioritize cleaning the most highly-trafficked areas and the most visible ones in your living space. No one but my husband and I have to put up with a messy bedroom, so it isn’t usually a priority. 
  • Showing up to a meeting less prepared than usual is still (usually) better than not showing up. If it’s still a value add, I show up – and I include a brief apology if it feels called for. 
  • Didn’t accomplish all my goals today? Didn’t get outside as much as I intended? Didn’t get to finish that project? No point in beating myself up about it. Let it go – I did good enough (or well enough) today. 

Does this resonate with you too? Is “let good enough be good enough” helpful for you? And if not, what do you think is the message you’d benefit from hearing or repeating right now? And if you know your Enneagram number, has that helped you to get clear about this? 

P.S. If you don’t know your number but would like to learn it in the company of others on their own personal journeys of growth, learn more about working with me here. And if you know your number but are still seeking community, I lead both an Enneagram Book Club and mental fitness groups. 

Recent articles from me you might enjoy: 

Creating space, allowing stillness

Anxious for the future? Quiet and control those hyper-vigilant thoughts

Finding gratitude while facing fascism

Enjoy the sun

10 ways your mind is messing with you

Joy as resistance

Tell me when I can pre-order your book!

Don’t feel like celebrating this week? Give back instead 

| jamiefeinberg

This week in Canada, we celebrated Canada Day, and while many are feeling very patriotic and proud of their country right now (or at least grateful to be in it, warts and all), I’ve recognized since we moved to Canada that for many, especially indigenous people, to celebrate Canada Day can feel disingenuous at best, and perhaps even entirely inappropriate, as the patriotic celebrations can feel like a whitewashing of history. I know that here in PEI, indigenous individuals and communities are playing a significant role in the celebrations, and I love seeing that, but I know it’s a bit of an imperfect solution, at best. 

I was thinking about how in all the Independence Day celebrations I experienced in the United States, I couldn’t even have imagined a true indigenous component to them. And it didn’t occur to me, in full transparency. This is one area where I think Canada is ahead of the United States, and I hope that in the future, Americans can think more about following in their footsteps. 

Similarly, there are plenty of other groups, whether it’s Black communities, the queer community, the disabled community etc., who may feel like they’re not ready to be patriotic. And right now, with fascism a growing reality and millions displaced without due process (or seemingly rhyme or reason), and unfortunately the promise of much more to come, I think anyone with a heartbeat and a conscience might be finding themselves wondering whether it’s appropriate to be celebrating. 

But today, I’m not going to answer that for you. Instead, I’ll encourage you to get quiet inside and decide for yourself whether patriotic displays, now or in the future, are worthy of your support. 

Also, I wanted to remind you that when you’re struggling to feel grateful, or to feel grounded, finding a way to give back can be an extraordinary way to do so. It can often be one of the easiest ways to find fulfillment and even joy. 

Photo of someone feeding a white chicken by Alex P

I’ve been giving back in many ways. I give back as a mental fitness instructor and coach, allotting a portion of my work each month to supporting people who otherwise wouldn’t have access. I donate money to nonprofits doing good work, and I draw attention to the good work of people and organizations so that others might feel inspired to do the same. 

This past Sunday, I led a showtunes singalong, and it allowed me to give back in two ways. First off, we set aside a percentage of ticket sales to go to Peers Alliance, a local nonprofit important to the queer community, and to the Transgender Law Center, doing important work in the United States. While that itself felt like a meaningful gesture, even on a small scale, I also felt the joy of giving back by sharing my performing gifts with others. There’s something about singing together that really is healing, and I could feel the joy and power in a room of present, connected humans, many previously strangers, coming together in song. 

Where do you give back? Where do you volunteer? Who do you care for, teach, or show your love to? Do you fight for causes you believe in or run for office? 

Let love be your guide. Choose love. Choose to channel your energy to what matters most to you. Find energy in supporting those who need more than you, or at least whose needs align with what you have to offer. 

And please remember: You’re here. I’m proud of you. We are glad you’re here. Keep breathing. Keep taking care. 

And please let me know: where do you give back? Or where would you like to? 

P.S. One way I give back is through my Enneagram work. My group Enneagram programs are offered on a sliding scale, and I do them out of love. Learn more here, we’d love to have you join us to do this important work on yourself that is best done in community with others. 

Recent articles from me you might enjoy: 

Creating space, allowing stillness

Anxious for the future? Quiet and control those hyper-vigilant thoughts

Finding gratitude while facing fascism

Enjoy the sun

10 ways your mind is messing with you

Joy as resistance

Tell me when I can pre-order your book!